Commercial of the Week: Sony VAIO

The best of working from home from Sony. But then, no one ever does this, right? (Windows wmv file approx. 3.0 Mb)

Deduct-A-Buck

Well, it's tax season once again and H&R Block is working overtime. But they still managed to find time to create a fun new website (H&R Block -- FUN?!!!) called Deduct-A-Buck featuring their very own gameshow host, Max Refund. Guess the five correct answers and qualify to win real prizes. What a great promo idea from a normally staid company.

Bustabot -- The First Online Pop-Up Book

I love to collect pop-up books of all kinds. Some of my favorite books are interactive and since our housefire a couple of years back, I've been adding all of Robert Sabuda's books to my new collection. Anyway, I just discovered this interesting link today for the Adventures of Bustabot. You can make the images move or pop up by pulling (clicking and dragging) the tabs on each page. Fun!

Women Will Never Understand...

Hey -- the Seattle Seahawks are goin' to the Superbowl next weekend! I generally love going out to shop on Superbowl Sunday because there's almost NO traffic on the roads and not very many men in the stores once that game starts. Seattle will probably resemble a ghost town when Superbowl XL starts. And with that, here's a commercial for the Spanish Fox Sports that says it all.

How to Build a Sideways Room

Many of my friends also know that I never actually officially graduated from high school (I never went back to write a history exam to up my score -- oh well...). But if I had gone on to college, this is the kind of stunt I'd probably also have been doing there. This kid has documented his sideways room project complete with photos on LiveJournal. Hmmm -- April Fools Day is coming up!

Get Your Last Best Chance DVD Here

Last Best Chance is a new movie that was backed by a surprising group of people bonded by a common goal: preventing the proliferation of nuclear and biological weapons into evil hands. Their website tells you more about the movie and recent reviews and you can actually order the movie as a FREE DVD directly from them (postage included!).

Last Best Chance was originally shown on HBO. Their backers are a bipartisan, international coalition of liberal AND conservative leaders and actors who all want to get this chilling message across to as many people as possible. Spread the word and order the movie.

Voted Best Joke of the Year in Australia (Sadly)

Aussie walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says: "Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."

His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot."

Aussie says: "I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."

A Woman from the Inside Out

Nothing dirty here. But this is some really cool code work to present a drawing that seems to draw itself. I played with the speed and the high/low resolution settings for some interesting effects. I can see why it won awards.

Want to Waste Some Time Today?

For those of you with a love for stupid computer games...

Catholic Code Words

I always suspected that different groups and religious affiliations had their own secret codes. The Masons have always had their special books and secret handshake. Well, someone sent me this Catholic Code list today and I decided it was worth passing on:

This information is for Catholics only. It must not be divulged to non-Catholics. The less they know about our rituals and code words, the better off they are.

AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.
BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass.
CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync.
HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.
HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range.
RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left.
INCENSE: Holy Smoke!
JESUITS: An order of priests known for their ability to find colleges with good basketball teams.
JONAH: The original "Jaws" story.
JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.
KYRIE ELEISON: The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize besides gyros and baklava.
MAGI: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower.
MANGER: Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't covered by an HMO. (The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough.)
PEW: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches.
PROCESSION: The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats.
RECESSIONAL: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.
RELICS: People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand.
TEN COMMANDMENTS: The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman.
USHERS: The only people in the parish who don't know the seating capacity of a pew.

Commercial of the Week: Smartest Man in the World

This one's an ad for Montavit Mineral Water, which uses the byline "A Moment of Clarity." About 46 seconds and funny (at least for guys!). (MPG file format 3.8 Mb)

T-Shirts as Great Social Humor

A lot of my old friends know me as having made my first big bucks in the t-shirt business. So while I have sworn off ever wearing imprinted t-shirts or logo-branded crap for life, it doesn't mean I don't appreciate an exceptionally funny one that comes along on rare occasion.

I looked on the t-shirt phenomenon as something of a social commentary for the times. When I first started printing them in the late 60's (right after the short-lived tie-dyed craze), the more irreverant the better. We made political statements and made fun of corporate slogans, among some of the subjects we picked. This clip came over the wire today that covered a company producing the Willy Nagin and the Chocolate Factory t-shirts and bumper stickers. I love it! Here's to Ray Nagin -- Eat chocolate, you racist bastard!

LOVEMAKING TIPS FOR SENIORS

1. Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. Turn them ALL OFF!

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Keep extra polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

(Notice I posted this in large type so you can read it)

World's Dumbest Dog

This dog has got to be the all-time stupidest dog I've ever seen or it's suffering from the worst case of canine dementia I've ever seen. (Windows Media format 2.9 Mb wmv file)

Like Word Puzzles and Mind Games?

Here's a fun Mensa-style test on old English expressions. Amazing how many you know (or don't know).

Getting from Here to There (or There to Here)

The never-ending number of places where you can find information simply numbs the mind. Want to know the distance from city-to-city in the States? Click here. Or you can also look up other destinations around the globe.

How to Set a Table

Here it is, albeit late for the holidays this year. But in case you ever wondered where everything goes on a table...

Stop-Motion Photography

Photography has come a long way since the days of Eadweard Muybridge and his trip-wire photographs of humans, animals and humans AND animals, all caught in mid-movement. Here's a collection of some incredibly crisp photos that truly seem to stop time.

So There was This Deer on the Hood of A Car, see...

From Comedy Central, a funny 3-minute clip of a dead deer strapped to the hood of a car. Always fun messin' with people's heads... (Windows WMV Media file: 5.2 Mb)

The Norwegian Firetruck

One dark night outside a small town near Poulsbo in Washington, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames.

The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around. When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, "All our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact."

But the roaring flames held the firefighters off. Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate.

As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could bring out the company's secret files.

From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight.

It was the nearby Norwegian rural township volunteer fire company composed mainly of Norwegians over the age of 65. To everyone's amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant.

Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno.

Outside, the other firemen watched as the Norwegian old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire & fought it back on all sides.

It was a performance and effort never seen before.

Within a short time, the Norske old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas.

The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters.

The local TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking their chief, "What are you going to do with all that money?"

"Vell," said Ole Larsen, the 70-year-old fire chief, "Da first thing ve gonna do is fix da brakes on dat focking truck!"

All in the Name of Science

[This is too funny! No offense intended to anyone in Arkansas that I might happen to know... Wait! Wait! I don't KNOW anyone in Arkansas!]

A small zoo in Arkansas received a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the gorilla - a female - became very difficult to handle.

Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available to take care of the situation.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition: Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions.

"First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "You can't never tell no one about this." The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the chil'run raised Southern Baptist." Once again, the Keeper agreed.

"And last of all", Bobby Lee stated, "You gotta give me another week to come up with the $500.00."

Senior Center Party

Last night I went to a party at our local senior center. The last Saturday of every month they have an evening potluck supper. We usually eat, play bingo, reminisce and ornery old Dick Thompson usually cops a feel or two from the ladies.

We heard Selma Martin's grandson is staying with her for a few weeks. It's rumored he got into a pinch over some marijuana with the law out in Phoenix and he came to Sarasota to avoid the heat. Anyway, Selma is known for her delicious Brownies and she always bakes up a quadruple batch for each get-together. She makes enough for everyone and some for folks to take one home for later. For some reason they were extra good this week and every last one of them was eaten. Not a one left over. We later found out that Selma's grandson, Butch, laced the brownies with some of his marijuana.

Knowing this, I guess it offers a logical reason for everyone feeling good that night. By the time Zeke put on the bunny hop record, everyone was in a real good mood and it was the first time the whole place got up and danced...

That is until the cops came to check all the noise complaints.

Well, that's another story...

Parking Problems?

I could be sexist and say that this is the perfect car for a woman but I think this is a great idea for anyone living in the city. (Windows WMV file 1.65 Mb)

The Sneeze...

I've seen variations on this one but it never ceases to amaze and entertain. All I can say is 'What a sneeze!' (Windows WMV file 1.2 Mb)

Horny French Guy

But this is NOT what you might think. Fun to watch. (Windows WMV file 3.8 Mb)

Who's the Dummy?

A young boy enters a barbershop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"

The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"

Something to Ponder

A friend sent me this link to a page that elaborates what it might be like if the entire globe consisted of a village with just one hundred people. Food for thought for the New Year...

Two Styles of Yoga

It always amazes me when I see how similar some cross-cultural traditions can be, even when they're from opposite ends of the continent.

Traditional Indian Yoga:











Traditional Irish Yoga:

Another Little Distraction...

And while you're at it, how about a new site that I consider the Wiki of How to Do Things -- Instructables? You can post and share your own instructions on how to do something you know well (or not-so-well...).

History of the Best UFO Pictures Ever Taken

For all you old X-Files fans out there, being able to see all of the best UFO pictures taken over the years from as far back as 1870 (What? They have pictures of UFO's from 1870?!!) is like heaven. Here's a link to Page 1 of The Best UFO Pictures Even Taken and you can then follow them through the years to modern times. You can also hit their main page and check out all their other research, pictures and even videos.

From Outer Space

Want to see an exploding star? From Space.com.

Doogle: The Irish Search Engine

This one's bound to make anyone chuckle. Especially if you're Irish... (Tom, do you hear me?)

New Living Will

Feel free to download and use! Click on the image to enlarge and then right-click to download. (approx. 60K gif file)

More Scoop on FREE 4-1-1 -- It's for REAL!

A lot of my friends wrote back to me on my earlier posting on a service called FREE 4-1-1; some of you are just wa-ay too skeptical. I posted about how you can get no-fee telephone listing information simply by dialing 1 (800) FREE 411. Guess what? It's real! Here's the confirmation on FREE 411 from Snopes.com, the Urban Legends site. Apparently they make money from occasionally slipping in a commercial (every third inquiry or so and it only lasts about 12 seconds -- very tolerable considering the cell phone companies charge you $1.50 for each call and your regular phone company charges at least 75¢ per call).

And here's a link to the demo they made at Demo 2005 where they raised $400,000 of seed funding to get off the ground. Not only that, they also started a website where you can look up numbers as well: Free411.com. You gotta love these guys -- goes to show that when everyone else starts getting greedy and charging too much, there's an opportunity in there somewhere! (And in case you want to know more about them, here's a link to their main website.)

Demolitions: Good and Bad

I still remember sitting at the Harbour Club in Downtown Seattle on the morning of March 26, 2000 to watch the demolition of the old Kingdome. It was incredible watching the perfectly synchronized charges go off around the perimeter and up the sides, taking the whole complex down in a matter of a minute or so. (6 Mb MPG file) Then there are the Not-So-Successful demolition jobs like this one. (1.7 Mb Quicktime MOV file).

Commercial of the Week: How'd They DO That?!!

Here's an amazing remix of the Gene Kelly dance sequence from Singing in the Rain, completely modernized and made into a commercial for the Volkwagen Golf GTI. Impressive computer graphics work. Looks like we'll be seeing more of these in the future as CG continues to get better and better. Lots of dead movie stars making a comeback, no less... (Quicktime movie format, approx. 5.9 Mb)

Want to Get Rid of Your Old CD's AND Get a New iPod?

Millenium sells used CD's in Charleston, SC and needs to bulk up their inventory in the New Year. Guess what idea they came up with? They'll trade iPods for your used CD's! In person or by mail even! So here's their deal:

• 45 CDs = 512 MB iPod Shuffle
• 65 CDs = 1 GB iPod Shuffle
• 85 CDs = 2 GB iPod Nano
• 110 CDs = 4 GB Nano
• 130 CDs = 30 GB iPod
• 175 CDs = 60 GB iPod

Check out Millenium here while they're still accepting trades.

Fantastic Animal Photography

Just when you think you've gotten links to every cute wildlife photography site you could possibly imagine, a truly beautiful new one shows up in my Inbox. Check out Wild Things Photography