Don't Buy an HP All-in-One Printer

So says a poor slob over in Iraq who just wanted them to tell him how to get it back up and running so he could do his job. HP used to have fantastic support for all of their products and I used to consider them second to none. But I hate poor tech support. As shown on YouTube or watch it here. Pass this on.

Thank God for Advances in Dentistry

My brothers and I still remember going to the rather sadistic Dr. Goldberg, our family dentist, during the 50's and 60's. And they weren't fond memories. Everything was painful back then, especially to kids. He had some of the nastiest dental tools you could imagine back then unlike the state of dentistry equipment today. Hell, just getting past the needle was a major accomplishment. But can you imagine how bad it probably was back in the 30's? Well, Modern Mechanix has a recent post of an article from Popular Science Magazine from 1939 that shows a macabre device invented by an obviously twisted dentist used to measure your mouth for a denture plate. Yow! Can I have some more of that cocaine, doc?

Best Amateur Domino Video

Three Japanese kids who really have too much time on their hands. But damn -- They're good! You'll sit on the edge of your seat to see if they make it to the grand finale! Link is HERE.

Naked Headlines

A friend sent along this link to a cool headline generator that uses nudes in a tasteful way to form letters of the alphabet. They include the HTML code for direct inclusion on your website. Sadly, the Russian developers made a poor attempt at translation and called it Pornoname even though there's nothing in bad taste. Just type in the headline you want to set in their "font."

George W. Accepts Ahmadinejad's Invitation for Debate

Dear Mahmoud:

I think your idea for a debate is a wonderful idea. Here's a Google Map to help you find the place. In fact, I'm sending Air Force One over there to pick you up right now.

Regards
George W. Bush

Spray It -- Don't Say It!

From the restrooms of the Washington DC National Zoo. (Found posted on Echos of Cold Moon) Something I surely didn't know and perhaps didn't WANT to know!

Why We Need the Internet

Hilarious animation using a song from the Broadway play AvenueQ.

Where the Hell is Matt?

It's Friday and I came across this 3½-minute video on YouTube called Where the Hell is Matt? It's silly and might even strike you as a little trite; but I did find it light-hearted and thought it might bring a smile to your face like it did to me.

Nasty Photo

Back in late June, we took a short vacation to the Washington Coast when one of Donna's old friends came out to visit her in Seattle. I forgot to post this picture of a sign that had caught my eye as I was walking up a street in downtown Port Angeles. I had to do a double-take when I first saw it and then realized that the sign actually said something different as you walked closer towards the restaurant. Nasty Chinese Restaurant!

Roommates

Never do crazy stuff in your dorm room if you have a sneaky roommate. Wonder if he killed the guy after he posted the video?

Commercial of the Week (at last)

At last: A new, funny commercial for the week. And it's for life insurance (?!!). Link is HERE on VeryFunnyAds.

Wow! Breathtaking Ride Through Paris!

You think I have too much time on my hands? This guy did a double mashup, combining Google Maps and Google Video. He takes an 8-minute clip from a 1978 Claude LeLouche film taken by a camera mounted on the hood of a Ferrari 275 GTB that was diven by a professional Formula 1 driver through the streets of Paris AND he combines it with a Google Map of Paris that tracks his ride in the film. (Just follow the directions on the page careullyfor best esults.) Apparently, when LeLouch requested a permit to close off the streets for safety, the cost was so phohibitive that they simply decided to shoot without one. Whichi what makes this such an even more thrilling piece of film work. All I can say is: WOW!!!

A Picture is Worth A Thousand Words

Now let's see... Aunt Minnie is in the middle and Cousin Laverne is on the left. Or was Cousin Laverne in the middle and Aunt Minnie was on the left? Why even bother wasting the film?

Religions of the World

This t-shirt pretty much covers it all.

What Your Dog is REALLY Doing in the Backyard

The clip speaks for itself... (Windows Media WMV format approx. 1.36 Mb)

Obsessive Compulsive Cat

...with a toilet flushing disorder! Click to play or go to YouTube.

Terrorist Funnies

An exceptionally fresh and witty comic strip that occasionally pokes fun at our favorite Islamofascist terrorists: Check out Wondermark by Dave Malki.

Opening a beer with a Piece of Paper

Just what it says. All in a YouTube video.

Test Your Bandwidth Free

This has got to be the coolest site I've seen for testing your bandwidth. You can choose from test locations from all over the globe by using the interactive map; they even let you save your results for future reference and to compare notes with your friends. Go to SpeedTest.net

Tech Support - Help with Wife 1.0

Dear Tech Support:


Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 and Racing 3.6 no longer run , crashing the system whenever selected.


I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!


Thanks,

A Troubled User

______________________________________

REPLY:


Dear Troubled User:



This is a very common problem that men complain about.



Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.


You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings: Alimony - Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.



The best course of action is to enter the command C:\ APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.



Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .


However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!



WARNING!!! DO NOT - under any circumstances - install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.



Best of luck,

Tech Support